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Best abadon ship
Apr 28, 2010 || 12:48

How much are we what our genes tell us to be and our time of birth (zodiac) makes us? How much are we what we make of ourselves? How much do the things we've gone through affect us?

How do we let go of what we think we ought to be like?

I've always been awful tense. 'Reserved' goes under that. I just can't bring myself to let go and have fun. For me the fun part comes after all is clear and set and in my control. I realize that's no way to be, and I *want* to relax, but..

Frustrating.

Last time I did something not much like myself was when I fell out of love. Now it's 'cause of the opposite reason.

Silly me.

In other news, while I went to work to get some money together, it is terribly tiring and I can hardly do my own hours. And so, when I'm called and asked to come in, I really, *REALLY* don't want to, 'cause I've got my own stuff to do and the only time I have to do it - and maybe to relax, eh? - would be taken away. My health has gotten worse (thankfully I got my doc's time to an earlier date) and the stress of constantly being in this fucking race to try and do everything - school, work, driving school (haven't found ANY time for it lately, but it's hanging over my head like an axe) - is really wearing me down.

What I don't like is getting a guilt trip like this. I can't. I really can't.

Is also interesting how people you've been together with a long time change, after yer relationship changes. Gets sort of a mean edge to it. Sad.

Maybe I ought to quit while I'm ahead? On all accounts.

I ought to get to studying. Kanji exam tomorrow.

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Small things about you
Apr 21, 2010 || 22:53

Secret dates with strangers
Dirty words and fighting talk
I'm so scared it's killed me
Time and time again
Spent the last weekend in Tartu. Celebrated M's birthday and on Sat got together with people I hadn't seen for.. 5 years? Horrible, 'cause they're wonderful people and I really should take the effort to visit them more often.

Life has been.. interesting recently. New exciting people.

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Are YOU an Elise?
Apr 14, 2010 || 01:29

As Miwju put her name into ze Urban Dictionary, I realized I've never even thought of it. And now, it turns out my name is sort of awesome.

perfection, pure perfection.
hi, i'm elise. god sent me. i'm here for the booze. i'd really like to fuck that sexy ass boy devin. he's a cutie.
Mad, mentally retarded but lovable and funny. Independent, stands out from the crowd in a good way.

Hi, God sent me, I'm mentally retarded? xD Makes sense.

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Guess This Song #2
Apr 11, 2010 || 21:16

Ten points go to Miwju for guessing Queen - I Want To Break Free. xD
シバレー ー おやすみ、月

どうしよう?赤ん坊だけど、
もし、電気が切って、
風が吹くかもしれ、
外で・・・
God, I crack me up. -.-;

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Guess This Song #1
Apr 6, 2010 || 16:24

Okay so G and me were in a class about the Tokugawa period, and while we got a bunch of homework done, my mind wandered for a moment and I started translating the song that was stuck in my head to Japanese. So, I suppose only my Japanese-speaking (almost wrote 'freaking') friends can really actually guess, but this whole translating thing is hilarious. For me. Well, at least someone, right?

So.

--
女王 ー 振り切りたい
振り切りたい!
振り切りたい!
あなたの愛から振り切りたくて、
あなたは独り善がりで、
あなたが要らないよ!
--

Oh and anyone who knows me, knows I'm awful at actually translating anything - when something translates odd, I just shrug and think it's s'posed to be this way. Also, this is just for fun.

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