<3

August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 June 2005 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 November 2010

How much are we what our genes tell us to be and our time of birth (zodiac) makes us? How much are we what we make of ourselves? How much do the things we've gone through affect us?

How do we let go of what we think we ought to be like?

I've always been awful tense. 'Reserved' goes under that. I just can't bring myself to let go and have fun. For me the fun part comes after all is clear and set and in my control. I realize that's no way to be, and I *want* to relax, but..

Frustrating.

Last time I did something not much like myself was when I fell out of love. Now it's 'cause of the opposite reason.

Silly me.

In other news, while I went to work to get some money together, it is terribly tiring and I can hardly do my own hours. And so, when I'm called and asked to come in, I really, *REALLY* don't want to, 'cause I've got my own stuff to do and the only time I have to do it - and maybe to relax, eh? - would be taken away. My health has gotten worse (thankfully I got my doc's time to an earlier date) and the stress of constantly being in this fucking race to try and do everything - school, work, driving school (haven't found ANY time for it lately, but it's hanging over my head like an axe) - is really wearing me down.

What I don't like is getting a guilt trip like this. I can't. I really can't.

Is also interesting how people you've been together with a long time change, after yer relationship changes. Gets sort of a mean edge to it. Sad.

Maybe I ought to quit while I'm ahead? On all accounts.

I ought to get to studying. Kanji exam tomorrow.

Labels: kangae, kuruma, raifu, shuul

Secret dates with strangers
Dirty words and fighting talk
I'm so scared it's killed me
Time and time again

Spent the last weekend in Tartu. Celebrated M's birthday and on Sat got together with people I hadn't seen for.. 5 years? Horrible, 'cause they're wonderful people and I really should take the effort to visit them more often.

Life has been.. interesting recently. New exciting people.

Labels: dikteeshon, raifu

As Miwju put her name into ze Urban Dictionary, I realized I've never even thought of it. And now, it turns out my name is sort of awesome.

perfection, pure perfection.
hi, i'm elise. god sent me. i'm here for the booze. i'd really like to fuck that sexy ass boy devin. he's a cutie.

Mad, mentally retarded but lovable and funny. Independent, stands out from the crowd in a good way.

Hi, God sent me, I'm mentally retarded? xD Makes sense.

Labels: dikteeshon, kangae

Ten points go to Miwju for guessing Queen - I Want To Break Free. xD

シバレー　ー　おやすみ、月

どうしよう？赤ん坊だけど、
もし、電気が切って、
風が吹くかもしれ、
外で・・・

God, I crack me up. -.-;

Labels: toransureeshon

Okay so G and me were in a class about the Tokugawa period, and while we got a bunch of homework done, my mind wandered for a moment and I started translating the song that was stuck in my head to Japanese. So, I suppose only my Japanese-speaking (almost wrote 'freaking') friends can really actually guess, but this whole translating thing is hilarious. For me. Well, at least someone, right?

So.

--

女王　ー　振り切りたい
振り切りたい！
振り切りたい！
あなたの愛から振り切りたくて、
あなたは独り善がりで、
あなたが要らないよ！

--

Oh and anyone who knows me, knows I'm awful at actually translating anything - when something translates odd, I just shrug and think it's s'posed to be this way. Also, this is just for fun.

Labels: nihon, shuul, toransureeshon